


Of Snow Fall and Awkward Situations

by Billxbesitztxmeinxherz



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-19
Updated: 2012-12-19
Packaged: 2017-11-21 13:20:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 13,647
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/598217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Billxbesitztxmeinxherz/pseuds/Billxbesitztxmeinxherz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tao is totally introverted. He has no friends, nothing really going on in his life except for studying and his job at the university library, and spends his days in solitude. That is, until he meets Kris, the only other Chinese student at their school. After an awkward first encounter, the pair become fast friends, however Tao begins developing feelings for the other boy which lands him in a less than desirable situation when he's caught jerking off in Kris's bed. Winter break is approaching but Tao has no idea how to communicate his feelings to Kris, let alone if Kris will forgive him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is dedicated to my lovely tlist family for the holiday season. Thank you all for your fantastic conversations, Christmas cards, and continual support with things in real life. Just a cute little story to get everyone in that holiday spirit! It’s cute, it’s cheesy, and it’s something a bit different from my normal writing style. This is a massive, massive fic so I had to split it into two parts. But I really enjoyed writing this, so I hope you all enjoy reading it as well. Happy Holidays! Cheers!

The snow was falling quietly outside as Tao stacked books back into the their correct order in the shelves. It fluttered towards the earth with such flitting grace that the university student just stood there for a moment, frozen and watching in melancholy as it fell.

 

“Just a bit more, Huang Zi Tao.” The teen brushed some dark hair from his eyes and frowned, staring out at the blanketed quad once more.

 

It was November in Sweden. By this time of the year, Beijing would already be getting the occasional snowstorm and Tao longed for home. Instead he was at university, a first year majoring in business and math, very far away from home and very lonely. He was in a foreign country, still learning the language, and in the ethnic minority as his school. The tall teen spent most of the first semester secluded in his room, eating alone in a tucked away corner of the student quad, or at his job working in the library. It was a bit lonely at times, but Tao preferred it this way. Classes taught in Swedish were difficult enough and it was too much of a hassle to try and socialize with the rest of the students if they would spend most of the time trying to decipher the teen’s accent. There were other international students as well, but they were mainly from the United States or other parts of Europe.

 

Instead Tao kept to himself, excelling in all of his classes but not bothering to engage himself on campus unless mandated by the university. Tao was a quiet person by nature and this introverted lifestyle did not bother him… most of the time. However with the snowfall and brisk winter winds that swept through the large stone buildings of campus, Tao began longing for home. There was still a solid month before winter break and time seemed to be creeping by slower and slower with each passing day.

 

The teen glanced out the window once more, glazed expression, when he registered a person standing by himself in the snow. Tao set the book he was holding down, inching closer as his fingers tentatively touching the cold panes of glass, as he stared at the scene before him. A student, tall in stature, with dirty blonde hair stood in the quad, eyes closed, head tilted upwards towards the sky. It was normal for students to enjoy the beautiful winter surroundings however what made Tao double take was that the student was oriental. Tao swallowed, the only other students he’d run into were from Thailand or Malaysia. This student was undoubtedly Chinese.

 

Tao did not even process what he was doing until he’d darted from his spot and was met with the cold air as he ran out into the snow. All the dark-haired teen could think about was confirming that this boy was in fact also Chinese and that Tao’s poor mind wasn’t playing tricks on him. His university was not a very big one so Tao knew all of the minority students and he’d never seen this student before.

 

Tao rounded the pillar and stopped just short of entering the quad. At this close of a range there was no mistaking it, this student was what Tao suspected. Tao watched the boy, taking in the crease to his almond-shaped eyes, the dark roots peeking out through his dyed blonde hair, the jade bracelet that hung loosely on the boy’s wrist. He was tall, taller than Tao, pale in complexion, fashionably dressed in an orange sweater and mustard yellow jacket. Tao suddenly became all too aware of his own appearance, what with his old hand-me-down black jacket and his no-name jeans. This other student seemed so cool and composed. Tao was instantly intimated. The dark-haired teen turned to leave, instantly realizing how strange it would be for him to simply approach this other student, when his shoes crunched loudly in the snow.

 

The blonde student quickly spun around, a startled expressing on his face, as his sought out an embarrassed Tao trying to hide behind one of the building’s pillars. Tao’s face burned, as the other student simply stared at him confused, and Tao cleared his throat.

 

“Um…” Tao searched for the words in Swedish in his head, “Hello. I’m sorry. I was just… I thought I’d left my gloves out here. I didn’t know that someone was using this area.”

 

“It’s a public area. I have no control who can enter and who cannot.” The taller teen smirked and Tao’s face burned even redder.

 

“Sorry.” Tao muttered, turning to leave. “Okay, I’ll be taking my leave now.”

 

“Where are you from?” It Tao a moment to registered that the other had just spoken to him in Mandarin.

 

“Beijing.” Tao smiled, when the other teen sent him a soft knowing smile. “What about you?”

 

“Guangzhou. Are you a first year?” The teen moved closer and Tao met him halfway. Hearing Mandarin was like music to his ears and judging from the other teen’s face, the blonde felt the same.

 

“Yeah. I’m Huang Zi Tao. I live in south quad.” Tao stuck his hand out for a handshake and the blonde laughed.

 

“Have you really forgotten our ways already? Huang Zi Tao, I am Wu Yi Fan but I go by Kris.” The blonde dropped into a bow.

 

“Oh!” Tao blushed dropping into a bow as well. However, Kris was just starting to stand up when Tao ducked down. The two knocked heads before staggering backwards away from each other, groaning in pain.

 

“I-I’m sorry!” Tao apologized frantically dropping into a bow once more and Kris backed up.

 

“Whoa! Maybe it’s best if we forget about our traditions while here.” Kris held up his hand in mock fear.

 

Tao’s face was on fire at this point. He was not one to normally blush but being made a fool in front of someone who clearly understood Tao’s background made the teen nervous. Kris was so cool and composed, like a manga character what with his long legs, passionate eyes, and laid-back manner. The taller teen had an aura of confidence to him while Tao felt like an awkward duckling talking to someone so well composed. The two might have come from the same country, but Tao could already tell that they were worlds different.

 

“Right then.” Tao swallowed as his skin burned with embarrassment. “It was nice meeting you. I have to return to my job at the library now.”

 

“Wait a minute,” Kris reached out and grabbed the smaller boy’s arm not letting him leave, “You’re going to just dart off like that? You were sneaking behind that pillar with the intention of trying to talk to me, weren’t you?”

 

Tao’s head shot up as he met the smirking face of the blonde. Kris knew. He had seen right through Tao’s pathetic lie of losing his glove and called teen right out on his somewhat stalkerish behavior.

 

“L-let go of me!” Tao shook his arm free and looked away in shame. “I already told you, I was looking for my gloves.”

 

“Sure you were.” Kris grinned before leaning in to rest a large hand on Tao’s shoulder, the smaller boy shrank under the elder’s touch and winced slightly, “Well it was nice meeting another Chinese here. If you ever want someone to speak Mandarin with, I go to the library on Thursdays.”

 

“Hmm.” Tao refused to meet Kris’s cocky grin and shrugged the other’s hold off him. “See you around campus.”

* * *

It was that Thursday that Tao saw the blonde-haired teen again.

 

Kris was sitting alone in one of the studying carols in the library, dressed smartly in a blue plaid shirt and glasses, as he hunched over his textbooks. Tao was surprised to see the other student again so quickly. He’d made an idiot of himself the time meeting Kris, looking like some desperate nerd that was desperate for friends and Tao turned away quickly.

 

The teen inched further down the aisle he was stacking books in and peered between the shelves to where Kris was. If only he could stay hidden like this, then Tao wouldn’t have to awkwardly encounter Kris again. Tao absolutely hated awkward situations and he cursed that out of all libraries on campus, Kris had to study in this one. Well then again, Tao did work in the main library but that piece of information seemed to escape the teen at the moment.

 

“Damn bastard.” Tao muttered, as he crouched lower in the aisle. “Why does he have to be here?”

 

Tao snuck a peek back at where Kris was sitting and frowned, quietly setting back to his work and making sure to avoid the other student for the duration of his shift.

* * *

It was the third Thursday that Kris was studying in the library that Tao finally realized this was a routine of Kris’s.

 

Tao cursed his bad luck and sneakily moved between the rows. The tiny cart of books had squeaky wheels that made a lot of noise but Tao moved slowly enough, they were pretty quite. Steadily Tao crept along, constantly craning his head back in the direction of where Kris was studying, as he left the security of his aisle to cross the library to access the shelves on the other side. There would be a five second span in which Tao would be totally exposed and the teen prayed that Kris would not pick that moment to look up.

 

“Okay.” Tao whispered, looking back towards Kris once more. The blonde totally immersed in his work and Tao braced himself.

 

Then the teen quickly pushed his little cart and darted for the rows opposite of him. A few people studying at various chairs looked up at the squeaking cart and Tao bit his lip, determinedly fast-walking to safety the books provided. When the teen was hidden from sight once more, Tao released a big sigh. He glanced back to Kris’s carol once more to make sure he hadn’t looked up only to see that the seat was completely empty. Tao froze.

 

“Have you been avoiding me?” A voice spoke in Mandarin from behind Tao.

 

The teen jumped, whirling around to see Kris standing at the end of the row, casually leaning against the bookshelf, eyes narrowed into a glare. The blonde was wearing a tight white button-down shirt today and navy slim-leg pants. The outfit was extremely flattering for the tall teen and Tao envied how cool Kris always was in appearance.

 

“Kris! Oh I didn’t see you there.” Tao’s smile twitched as he began stacking books at random, hoping desperately that Kris would just walk away.

 

“I asked you a question. Tao, have you been avoiding me?” Kris walked up to the dark-haired teen and took the book Tao had been holding from his hands.

 

“Kris,” Tao frowned, “Let me do my job.”

 

“Nuh uh.” Kris held the book high above his head and Tao looked to the other with wide eyes, “Answer my question and then I will return your book.”

 

“Of course I haven’t been avoiding you. That’s preposterous! I haven’t seen you until just now, so how could I be avoiding you?” Tao huffed.

 

“I come here every Thursday and you never even stop by to say hello. Instead I see you sneaking around the stacks like some rodent, thinking I haven’t seen you when in reality your cart is so damn loud it’s impossible not to notice you.” Kris returned Tao his book and fixed the other with a stern look.

 

“O-oh.” Tao blushed, “Well I didn’t know you wanted me to say hi. I saw how busy you were studying and figured it was best to just leave you alone.”

 

Kris hummed and suddenly leaned in closer to Tao. The movement caught Tao off guard and he dropped his book, back tensing as Kris peered closely at him.

 

“You’re a real weirdo, you know that? I figured you’d want to hang out since I’m Chinese too but you’ve just been avoiding me. What’s up with that? Did I offend you or something? Or do you simply think that because you’re from Beijing, you’re too cool to hang out with someone like me?” Kris’s voice held a dangerous tone to it and Tao blinked slowly at the other teen.

 

“What?” Tao blurted, “That’s what you think?”

 

“Well, you haven’t been talking to me so what am I supposed to assume?”

 

“I haven’t been talking to you because… because well you see…” Tao tried to figure out the best way to word it. Because Kris was cool and he wasn’t? Because Tao expected Kris to make fun of him if they ever met again?

 

“Yeah?” Kris leaned in a bit closer and Tao squeaked.

 

“I didn’t talk with you because you’re so cool and I didn’t know how to approach you. I’m extremely introverted. There, are you happy now?” Tao backed away from Kris and picked up his book from the ground.

 

“That’s it? That’s the reason?” Kris asked in disbelief.

 

“Yeah. Just… it would probably be best if you just left.” Tao set back to stacking his books and Kris stood there watching him.

 

“You’re a strange one, Huang Zi Tao.” Kris laughed, hand reaching out and ruffling Tao’s hair.

 

“H-hey!” Tao blushed, hands hanging uselessly at his side, mouth opening in shock, as Kris smiled kindly at him.

 

“Well don’t be so shy next time. Come over and say hi to me when you see me.” Kris switched back to Swedish and Tao grumbled.

 

“Yeah whatever. Let me do my job.” Tao returned in Swedish as well. Kris sent Tao a lazy smile before setting off for his studying area.

 

Tao turned back towards the bookcase and mentally swore. What was that warm feeling that entered Tao’s stomach when Kris had touched his hair like that? Why did the dark-haired teen’s heart beat so fast when Kris had smiled at him like that?

 

It was a strange feeling that left Tao feeling uneasy.

* * *

Tao was just getting off work at the library late Friday night when he heard Kris’s voice call out to him.

 

“Hey Tao!” Tao turned to see Kris walking across the quad to him, “Hey!”

 

“Hi.” Tao returned awkwardly. The teen had taken to greeting Kris whenever he saw on Thursdays. It was nothing much, Tao would simply say hi when he passed Kris and Kris would send him that heart-stopping smile and say hey in response. Their interactions did not go beyond that so Tao found it rather odd when Kris ran up to join him.

 

“You just getting off work?” Kris’s nose was red from the cold and Tao tugged his scarf tighter around his neck.

 

“Yeah. I was going to go get dinner now.” Tao looked down at his toes. Kris was standing so closely to the dark-haired teen and Tao was hyperaware of it.

 

“Oh hey! I just got out of a biology lab so I haven’t eaten yet either. Where were you going to eat? The main cafeteria?” Kris blew on his hands and rubbed them together.

 

“Yeah I was just headed there now.” Tao wondered where Kris was going with all of this.

 

“Well then I’ll walk with you there!” Kris grinned and Tao squinted at the taller boy.

 

“Okay then.” Tao hitched his backpack higher over his shoulder and set off towards the cafeteria.

 

“So how are your Fridays? You always work at the library?” Kris filled the silence between them when Tao didn’t speak for a few seconds.

 

“Um yeah. I work Mondays, Thursdays, and Fridays. I get out of classes at two so it’s no big deal.” Tao sighed. He despised small talk. It was simply an excuse to fill the silence of an awkward situation and Tao wondered why Kris even bothered.

 

“I have bio labs every Friday until six. I wish I got out a two. That would be nice.” Kris sighed wistfully.

 

“I get out at seven on Tuesdays due to my finance class.” Tao muttered and Kris raised his eyebrows.

 

“Alright then.” Kris nodded and looked ahead blankly.

 

“Look Kris, what do you want? Why do you keep talking to me?” Tao winced and snuck a glance at the taller teen.

 

“Do you not like me talking to you?” Kris frowned.

 

“No, I don’t mind it. But I’m curious as to why you even bother.”

 

“Because I’m trying to figure you out.” Kris replied simply and Tao inhaled.

 

“What?” The dark-haired teen stopped and looked to the other in confusion.

 

“I said, I’m trying to figure you out. You’re different than other people I’ve met. I want to get to know you better.” Kris grinned and Tao barked out a laugh.

 

“Different than other people you’ve met? I’m not all that special.” Tao laughed again as the pair entered the cafeteria.

 

“Okay so tell me about you then.” Kris resumed their conversation when both were seated at a booth.

 

“You can’t just ask people that.” Tao wrinkled his nose and Kris watched him strangely. “What?”

 

“Nothing.” Kris looked away quickly and Tao shifted uneasily.

 

“So anyways,” Kris cleared his throat, “I know that you are from Beijing. What about your family?”

 

“So we’re actually doing this then?” Tao groaned, setting down his burger. “I have a mother and a father. No siblings, I’m an only child. What about you?”

 

“I have a sister but that’s it. Oh! And obviously and mother and father as well.” Kris replied. “What about secondary school? Did you attend in Beijing?”

 

“I’ve been going to school in Europe since I was thirteen. I went to the Stockholm International School.”

 

“Since you were thirteen? Why?” Kris leaned across the table interested.

 

“No real reason.”

 

“No come on, there’s got to be a reason! You don’t just move to Europe from China randomly! What’s your story?”

 

“It’s really nothing exciting, Kris.” Tao narrowed his eyes.

 

“I think it’s pretty exciting to move to a different country at such a young age! So come on, tell me!”

 

Tao bit his lip. Here was where Kris learned about the messed up part of his life.

 

“My parents are divorced. My father lives and works in Beijing. My mother remarried a Swedish man so we moved here. I didn’t want to stick around when my mother played house with her new husband, so I became a boarding student at the international school. I haven’t lived at home since.”

 

“Oh…Tao…” Kris bit his lip and Tao smiled bitterly.

 

“You don’t have to say that you’re sorry. I’m really tired of hearing that from people. I’m happy being independent. I don’t mind.” The dark-haired teen clasped his hands together.

 

Kris sighed heavily, mind slowly starting to piece together Tao’s strange behavior. Kris slowly grasped one of Tao’s hands in his and rubbed his thumb reassuringly across the boy’s knuckles. The dark-haired boy started and retracted his hand quickly.

 

“Sorry.” Kris said softly and Tao nodded, face blushing.

 

“I miss Beijing. I don’t go back to visit that often but I still consider it home. I didn’t even want to move here but I had to since my mother and all.” Tao returned just as softly.

 

“It must be hard. Is that why you wanted to talk with me when you saw me? You probably haven’t had that many people to speak Mandarin with here.” Kris asked as Tao scooted back out of his chair and picked up his tray. “Tao?”

 

“I’m not hungry anymore.” Tao said, heading off towards the clearing section. Kris looked down to own unfinished meal and cursed, gathering up his tray, and hurrying off after the teen.

 

“Hey Tao,” Kris said as Tao disposed of his food, “Tao, I’m sorry if I upset you.”

 

“It’s not that.” Tao quipped and Kris tried to keep at pace with the boy. The pair exited the cafeteria and Tao tugged his scarf close once again.

 

“I’m heading back to my dorm.” Tao smiled weakly, “I’ll see you on Thursday.”

 

“Hey Tao.” Kris frowned when the teen turned to leave, “Tao. Tao!”

 

Kris reached out and spun the other around, freezing up when he saw that Tao had tears in his eyes.

 

“Tao.” Kris said softly, sorrowfully, and Tao sniffed against the brimming water in his eyes.

 

“I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” Tao laughed and furiously wiped his tears away. “It must be because I’m tired. I apologize that you have to see me like this.”

 

“Tao, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.” Kris held firm when Tao tried to walk away again.

 

“I already told you,” Tao sniffed once more, “It wasn’t you. I’m fine. Just let go.”

 

“Tao, I’m sorry.”

 

“Don’t say that.” Tao laughed against his tears, “You didn’t do anything. Now let go of me.”

 

“I did do something. I made you cry!” Kris said exasperated and Tao struggled against his hold.

 

“No you didn’t. I’m crying because I’m tired and this whole week just caught up with me. Now let go.”

 

“No.” Kris gripped the boy tighter and tugged him closer. “Come here.”

 

“Huh?” Before Tao knew it, he was being pulled into Kris’s arms for a hug.

 

The teen froze, eyes wide, as Kris’s frame enveloped his and held him tight. One of Kris’s arms was wrapped around the dark-haired teen’s waist while the other came up to rest on the top of Tao’s head to pull him to Kris’s chest.

 

“Kris.” Tao whispered. He could feel the blonde’s warmth surrounding him, Kris’s large reassuring hand resting softly on his head, as the elder curled around the younger.

 

“I’m sorry to bring up painful subjects. I just wanted to get to know you better. I shouldn’t have been so pushy with you.” Kris spoke lowly against Tao’s ear and the teen blinked away his tears.

 

“K-Kris.” Tao brought trembling hands up to push away the other’s frame but Kris wouldn’t let him.

 

“I’m here for you. We’re friends, Tao. I want us to be friends. Don’t push me away.” Kris said and Tao sobbed once more.

 

“Okay?” Kris asked, rubbing his hand on Tao’s back.

 

“Okay.” Tao trembled and buried his face into Kris’s chest. Ears burning with shame but Tao was too broken down to really care at this point.

* * *

Thursday was quickly becoming Tao’s favorite day of the week.

 

Thursdays meant that Tao got to see Kris and seeing Kris always brightened the teen’s day. Tao didn’t know when it had happened but he looked forwards to Thursdays and Fridays now. The pair got dinner together every Friday now and were quickly learning more and more about each other with each day.

 

“Hey you.” Tao smiled, resting his chin on the study carol. Kris looked up from his work and sent the boy that grin that always made Tao’s heart do weird flutters.

 

“Hey yourself. You getting bored from your boring job already? Come to bug the studious students?” Kris teased and Tao grinned.

 

“It’s not that boring. Besides, what studious students? I don’t see any studying going on here.”

 

“I was studying before you got here.”

 

“Kris, you have QQ open on your phone.” Tao laughed, pointing to the other’s phone where it lay scattered amongst his textbooks.

 

“Okay you caught me.” Kris tweaked Tao’s nose and the teen squeaked, hands flying over his nose to protect it.

 

“Kris.” Tao whined, “Don’t do that.”

 

“Aw don’t be such a baby.” Kris grinned.

 

“Don’t be so mean.”

 

“I’m not being mean. When am I ever mean to you?” Kris poked Tao’s cheek and the teen backed up, face slowly flushing.

 

“You always turn so red. You’re too easy.” Kris laughed and Tao frowned.

 

“I have to get back to work now.” Tao sniffed and Kris laughed, grabbing the teen by the shirt before he could go.

 

“Do you have any tests tomorrow?”

 

“Huh? No.”

 

“I was wondering if you wanted to chill and watch a movie tonight. I don’t have anything going on.” Tao’s heart leapt. It wasn’t a date, Kris’s tone made that very clear, it was simply watching movies like good friends, but Tao couldn’t help be happy at the prospect of just Kris and him watching a film together.

 

“Yeah I’d like that.” Tao smiled and Kris released his shirt.

 

“Okay. I’ll text you after dinner, okay?”

 

“Alright then.” Tao nodded before letting Kris resume his studying.

 

Then the teen waddled off, grinning from ear to ear. Tao happily set about stacking books for the rest of his shift.

* * *

It was the first week of December that Tao began dreaming of Kris.

 

The pair had been consistently hanging out everyday together for the past few weeks. Tao met Kris after his morning classes and Kris ran across campus to see Tao when he got off his job at the library. It was a heck of a trek and Tao offered to simply meet Kris at his dorm but Kris liked walking and talking with the teen. Thursdays were still the pair’s designated library day, Tao would occasionally walk the carol that Kris was studying in and chat with the other student quietly.

 

They ate most of their breakfasts and dinners together, they studied together on Sundays, they walked with each other before splitting up for classes, and they got mail together, as the pair was basically strapped at the hip. Kris had introduced Tao to his circle of friends and Tao was grateful for that. The dark-haired teen had not bothered making any friends of his own and Kris’s were accepting enough of the newest member to their group.

 

Kris was like a blessing from above. He provided Tao with company, made the teen laugh, helped ease the ache for home, and had quickly become the closest friend that Tao ever had. Kris was handsome, popular with the other students regardless of the language barrier, kind, and charismatic. It seemed that no matter they went on campus, people always stopped to greet the blonde student or ask him if he was going to some event. He was the most perfect person Tao had even known and the teen had developed a sort of crush on the elder.

 

Tao dreamt silly nonsensical things like dreams about them dating or dreams about them doing romantic things like picnicking together. There was no harm in that. But sometimes, Tao’s dreams would become more sexual in nature and it was after those that Tao found it difficult to face Kris the next day.

 

Kris was straight. That was pretty easy to figure out and Tao felt dirty for dreaming about his friend in such a way. Tao tried to fight his feelings, he really did, but Kris just had a way of melting his heart every time they interacted. Kris knew all the right things to say, all the right things to do, to affect Tao and leave the teen a blushing mess like a schoolgirl’s crush.

 

Tao had even touched himself once, but only once, in the shower to the thought of Kris. The dark-haired student had never come so hard in his life but he’d felt immense guilt afterwards. Tao hadn’t talked to Kris at all that next day. Kris had been concerned that he’d done something and did his best to apologize to Tao, which resulted in Tao having to get over his embarrassment and quickly make up with the elder.

 

Hanging out with Kris was pure bliss for Tao and as each day passed, his feelings for the blonde grew deeper and deeper. Surely there was no one as perfect as Kris.

 

Tao only lamented in the fact that his affections would never be returned.

* * *

“I’m just gonna go rinse off okay?” Kris asked, tossing his backpack down onto the floor. “You can just chill for a few. My roommate won’t be back until later so it’s no big deal.”

 

“Oh. Okay.” Tao smiled softly, sinking down onto Kris’s bed as the elder stalked around the room gathering his necessities for the shower.

 

Tao was only mildly sweaty but Kris’s neck and back were soaked. It was that kind of nasty sweat one acquires when exercising outdoors in cold weather climates. The kind where the cold winter air kept one’s skin chilled but a hot sweat broke beneath one’s clothes. It was the easiest way to get hypothermia and Kris wanted to warm up his body quickly.

 

“I won’t be long.” Kris said, starting to peel off his shirt from his sweaty body and Tao’s eyes widened.

 

A long expanse of toned pale skin was revealed, muscles flexing to remove the article of clothing, a dark treasure trail leading down between the cut lines of Kris’s Adonis belt. Tao sat absolutely still, eyes glued to the other’s form, while Kris proceeded to remove his clothing totally unaware. He finally stopped when his long legs kicked themselves out of his pants, underwear remaining on much to Tao’s relief and disappointment, before he sent the dark-haired teen a goofy wink and disappeared into the bathroom.

 

“Oh my god.” Tao whispered, as the shower spray turned on and Kris’s muffled singing voice began drifting through the door.

 

Kris, Kris in all of his naked glory, with his toned body and muscled form, was entirely naked, separated only by the width of a door. Tao could hear the water splashing off of Kris’s body as he rotated in the shower and the teen’s face burned bright red. It was physical attraction, there was no doubt in that, and Tao closed his eyes breathing heavily.

 

Kris’s bed was a tangled mess of black sheets and haphazardly thrown pillows. A crumpled pair of boxers and a large t-shirt with some American football team lay discarded at the end of the bed. Tao’s skin was starting to prick as the dark-haired teen inhaled the scent of Kris’s scent filling the room but mostly coming so strongly from the sheets. Tao stared at the boy’s pillow for a moment and then glanced back to the closed bathroom door. That scent, that strong musty scent, which was a combination of cologne and Kris’s natural smell, was surrounding Tao and driving him crazy. It was that scent that Tao smelt when Kris would jokingly wrap his around the shorter teen when they walked. It was the same scent that made Tao’s knees weak when they ducked their heads together while studying. It was that smell that Tao found himself longing to smell once more when the pair was separated in their individual classes during the day. It was the scent that Tao equated with Kris and Tao’s body began reacting no matter how much he wished it wouldn’t.

 

“Fuck.” Tao whispered, heart pumping in his ears as he looked to the bathroom once more. Tao had ‘one of those’ dreams last night about Kris and this situation was not helping. The teen had already been half-hard since seeing Kris earlier in the day, body reacting when Kris’s had slung an arm around Tao’s shoulder when they were walking.

 

Kris’s blissfully unaware voice continued singing softly and Tao bit his lip making his decision. Tao had time. Kris had just gotten into the shower. Tao still had time. The teen quickly shoved his hands down into his pants before shoving his face into Kris’s pillow.

 

“Ugh.” Tao moaned softly, fingers kneading his taut flesh as he began working up and down his shaft.

 

The teen hadn’t jacked off in awhile and he was oversensitive, body pricking with pleasure from every touch. Tao started off wrapping his fingers around his base before dragging his hand up, twisting his wrist, and coming back down. The movement slightly bent his cock uncomfortably but it brought pleasure as well. Tao repeated this motion over and over again a few times and while it was starting to make him leak, he knew that it would not be enough to bring him to completion. The smell of Kris surrounded him and Tao let his imagination wander. The teen envisioned that it was Kris touching him and the thought made the teen’s member jump.

 

“Oh yes.” Tao groaned into the pillow, ears picking up Kris’s low voice still humming away in the shower. Tao was on sensory overload, not only was he provided with Kris’s scent but audio as well.

 

Tao’s left hand moved down to pet the area behind the teen’s ball sack and began to stroke at the soft but firm skin there. He teased himself, eyes squeezed shut tightly, mouth agape, as his index finger aggressively petted that area over and over again. Tao moaned pathetically, trying in vain to stifle all of his sounds for fear of Kris being able to hear him over the spray of the shower. Meanwhile Tao’s right hand worked furiously, a loose grip around himself and he shifted his skin up and down as he fisted his cock. Precum was already gathering at the head, milky white fluid slowly dripping down onto Tao’s hand, and the teen mewled.

 

It felt so good. His fingers chilled from the cold outside, quickly pumping up and down the hot flesh of his cock. The boy was completely hairless down there, soft waxed skin kissing Tao’s rough knuckles as he worked himself in frenzy. Tao thought of Kris’s broad shoulders, what it would feel like to grasp those as the older teen’s large hands would grasp behind Tao’s thighs. He thought of what it would feel like to run his hands down Kris’s naked front, to trace the blonde’s muscles stomach and arms. He thought of how Kris’s hot erratic breath would feel against his arched neck as the taller man would drive in between the teen’s thighs.

 

The last image was enough to bring Tao teetering at that peak and the dark-haired boy coughed, eyes blinking open, mouth falling open, as he began to feel his orgasm approach. Kris’s scent was all around him and Tao’s hips bucked weakly, precum messily covering his hand, as his balls tightened. Tao could feel it. He was almost there. As Tao slowly began to lose it, he did not hear the shower spray turn off.

 

“Oh yes.” Tao mewled, body losing total control as he began to buck violently into the tight cavern that his hand provided, “Oh yes. God yes. Kris. Oh please! Ugh!”

 

Then suddenly Tao was coming, hand moving sloppily up and down his shaft, as thick white ropes of cum splattered out across his hand and thighs. The teen struggled for breath, toes curling, body singing, hips arching up off of the bed, as Tao came hard.

 

“Tao, sorry to keep you waiting. It was just so damn cold and-” The bathroom door opened before Tao could even cover himself.

 

“Ah! Shit!” Tao turned away, struggling to pull his pants.

 

Kris stood in the doorway, clad in nothing but a towel, droplets of water sliding down his skin, as he stared mouth agape at Tao sprawled out on his bed. Kris’s back stiffened, eyes absorbing the sight that was Tao’s cum-splattered thighs, the teen’s flush faced, the way his tousled hair stuck to his sweaty forehead, to how heavily Tao was breathing. There was no question in Kris’s mind what Tao had been doing in his bed.

 

“T-Tao. What the fuck?” Kris barked although he did not even realized he’d raised his voice. Tao tensed, face burning in shame, as he belted his jeans, and waited to be struck. Surely Kris would hit him. What Tao had just done was disgusting. It was an invasion of privacy and it was disgusting to think about: two men together? There was something surely wrong with Tao.

 

Tao said nothing, head hanging as he waited to be beat. He could hear Kris shifting closer and the dark-haired teen jumped when Kris slammed his hand against the wall, leaning in close to stare down the younger. Kris was in such close proximity to Tao now, his scent fresh, much stronger than that of the sheets Tao has just jacked off in, and Tao’s body was already starting to react again. The teen winced, both from shock at Kris’s violent action but also as his member stirred in his soiled underpants. There was still cum on Tao’s hand and he subtly sat on it.

 

“Tao.” Kris said, voice all too close to the teen’s ear and Tao squeezed his eyes shut. “Tao say something. Explain this.”

 

Tao again said nothing and continued to keep his eyes closed. The two stayed like this for a few seconds before Kris scoffed, hand reaching out and roughly gripping Tao’s jaw, forcing the teen to face him.

 

“Open your eyes.” Kris’s voice wavered and Tao’s eyes shot open.

 

“K-Kris.” The younger’s voice trembled, eyes searching the other’s face frantically trying to assess the other’s reaction.

 

“Tao what were you just doing?” Kris spoke through gritted teeth. He looked pained and Tao felt awful. Of course Kris probably now hated him, Kris was probably disgusted with Tao and his actions.

 

“I-I…” Words failed Tao and he found that he could not speak, wishing to simply disappear in that moment. Kris’s grip tightened and Tao cried out softly. Then the blonde was leaning closer, eyes pinning Tao, as he brought their faces all too close for Tao’s liking.

 

“Are you a homo?” Kris breathed.

 

There it was. The word ‘homo’ that made Tao’s skin sting unpleasantly. There was no doubt that Kris was disgusted with him. Internal panic overtook the dark-haired teen and Tao slapped Kris’s hand away. Then the teen rose to his feet, pushing past a surprised Kris, as he darted out the door.

 

“Tao!” Tao heard Kris call after him but all Tao could think about was running away form this embarrassing situation. The teen skidded down the hallway and darted from the dormitory, not even caring that he’d left his coat in Kris’s room as the cold winter winds greeted him.

 

Tao’s entire body was on fire, face burning in shame and jaw tingling from where Kris had gripped him too roughly. He’d gone and ruined it. Tao had let his stupid crush get in the way of the one true friendship that he had and it hurt so badly. Kris would most likely never talk to Tao again. It was all over.

 

“It wasn’t worth it.” Tao sobbed, breaking into tears as he ran for his dorm.

 

“Goddammit it wasn’t worth it.


	2. Chapter 2

It was Thursday. Thursdays were quickly becoming Tao’s least favorite part of the week.

 

The teen had requested almost immediately after the incident to switch his work schedule around. Now Tao worked Mondays, Wednesdays, and Saturdays as to avoid Kris on Thursdays and Fridays. But still, Tao had to pass the library to get back to his dorm after his classes. Tao felt strange walking the past the library, knowing that Kris was probably somewhere inside, studying at his carol as he always was. Tao consistently tried to walk quickly past that building on Thursdays.

 

Kris had not texted Tao since that incident. He had not called Tao. In fact, Tao had maneuvered it so that he did not even see Kris since that incident. All Tao could think of was the shocked expression on Kris’s face when he was caught, the tone of anger in his voice. It burned Tao with shame.

 

Winter break was quickly approaching, the school had begun decorating the campus for Christmas, and Tao gazed at the garland adorning the lampposts as he walked back to his dorm. There was a Christmas party on Friday and he wouldn’t have planned on going, had it not been for the entire hall of his dorm demanding that he leave his room for once. They’d banged on his door and told him to live a little. Tao was not a fan of parties but he figured that if he did this, they’d all get off his ass and leave him to sulk for the rest of the year. Tao didn’t even have to stay that long.

 

“Hey Tao!” A girl from down the hall called when Tao reached his room. “How’s it going?”

 

“Good. What about you?” Tao sighed, not bothering to look the girl in the face.

 

“I’m doing well. You’re definitely coming to that Christmas party tomorrow, right?” The girl teased, lightly punching Tao’s arm and Tao immediately realized she was trying to flirt with him. The teen smiled wryly.

 

“Yeah I’m going.”

 

“Oh good! I’m glad you’re getting out more. By the way, I haven’t seen Kris around lately.” The girl said and Tao’s heart stopped, “Have you two been hanging out at his dorm more recently?”

 

“W-what? Yeah… something like that.” Tao turned back to his door. “Well I’ll see you tomorrow. I have a lot of work to do before then.”

 

“Oh.” The girl’s face fell but Tao was already unlocking his door.

 

“See you.” Tao muttered, slamming the door closed right when the girl looked as if she were about to say something else. Tao paused, leaning against the door, and looking out the peek hole as the girl awkwardly stood before his door. She frowned, staring at the door for a few moments, before shaking her head and moving on.

 

Tao hissed in pain and slid down the door. Normally he would not pull such a cold-hearted move. After all, Tao knew what unrequited love felt like more than anyone. But he could not bring himself to move on so quickly to another person. The wounds that Kris had left were still open and they stung each day as Tao spent more and more time apart from the tall blonde student.

 

Tao missed Kris’s smile when he’d run to come and join the younger when they walked together. Tao missed Kris in his entirety and these long days left alone, something that he used to crave at the beginning of the year, were now harshly lonely. Tao wished to be wrapped up in Kris’s arms, he wished for Kris to kiss him and tell him that everything was fine. Tao’s entire being felt empty without Kris. The other student had filled a void in Tao’s life that he had not even been aware was there.

 

Tao’s dorm room was plain simple, boring, and lacked a personal touch. The teen made his way to his bed and threw himself down unceremoniously. He had work to do before classes the next day but all Tao wanted to do was sulk.

 

Outside the cold Swedish winter raged on. The snow had started up again but unlike when Tao and Kris had first met, it now blew with the ferocity of knives, small sharp ice particles slicing through the air, just as the pain of first heartbreak sliced through Tao.

* * *

Music surrounded Tao from every angle, loud obnoxious rap, the rappers saying their insults or telling tales of their thug street life so quickly, that Tao was not even able to translate fast enough in his head.

 

Most of the student body was crammed into the shoddy pub down the street that most of Tao’s classmates frequented on the weekends. It was a small establishment, a single roomed building, with an expansive courtyard where people were drinking huddled around bonfires in trashcans. It was no longer snowing, however the night air was cold. The girls had taken to fashionably bundling themselves up with colorful scarfs and gloves. The boys wore thick wool sweaters and gloves, each tossing their coat aside in hopes to demonstrating how hearty they were.

 

Christmas lights hung from the trees overhead and lined the edge of the bar. The bar was very poorly lit, the small red or white LED bulbs the only source of light at the party. Alcohol was flowing freely, people were shouting and singing, a dance floor had formed inside, as people outside had engaged in funneling. It was a rowdy festivous event where everyone had been instructed to wear Christmas sweaters and most of the student body as finished, or well on their way to completing, final exams.

 

By the time Tao had arrived with a few people from his dorm, mostly everyone was thoroughly buzzed. A drink had been shoved in Tao’s hand, some nice German beer, as he was tugged through the crowd. The girl that had greeted Tao earlier was there, she’d put a lot of effort into her appearance, her long blonde hair styled into large curls, a soft red dress falling nicely on her frame. Tao on the other hand was in an itchy green sweater with a reindeer stitched on the front, a borrowed article from the boy across the hall. The girl had been especially clingy to Tao once they entered the bar and Tao felt pity for her.

 

“Some party, huh?” The girl shouted, fingers digging into Tao’s arm, as they passed one of the large pulsing speakers.

 

“Yeah. I didn’t know it was going to be this crowded.” Tao said, eyes scanning the crowd.

 

It was a much bigger party than Tao had anticipated. Twice already he’d spotted some of Kris’s friends by the bar and Tao wondered briefly if there was the chance that Kris would show up as well. Tao desperately wanted to see Kris, he didn’t even have to talk to him, he just wanted to see the blonde and ease the ache in his heart.

 

“I’m glad that you came out.” The girl continued to babble but Tao was only half listening.

 

Across the room, the one person that Tao wanted to see appeared. Kris, tall gorgeous Kris, dressed in a white sweater and a grey wool knit hat, was lounging against the bar. He was standing amongst his friends, the ones that Tao had sort of become friends with through Kris but now avoided out the fear that Kris had blabbed about the incident in his room. The blonde was nursing a beer, eyes hooded dangerously, as he laughed at whatever his friends were talking about.

 

Tao swallowed thickly, ears burning, heart racing, as he body urged him to run up and hug the taller boy. However logic won out and Tao slowly began to back away, fear consuming him, it was a miracle that the two hadn’t run into each other yet in such a small place. Tao didn’t want to talk to Kris, while he did want to somehow explain himself and make things normal between the two, there was no explanation that Tao could think of. There was no way to spin or twist the situation that Kris had saw. It was quite obvious what Tao had been doing, the proof had been spread all over his legs.

 

Kris laughed once more when a dark-haired girl came up and wrapped her arms around his waist. Kris welcomed her touch, placing his own arm around her shoulders, and leaning down to bring her face closer to his.

 

Tao looked away before he could witness the pair kiss.

 

“Tao!” The blonde girl at Tao’s side demanded his attention.

 

“Huh?” The teen turned back to his face his own group.

 

“I said your name like ten times and you just totally spaced out! What were you even looking at?” The girl tried to peer around Tao but the dark-haired student quickly seized her by the shoulders.

 

“Holly, do you want to dance?” Tao asked, internally panicking. He didn’t want this stupid loud girl drawing Kris’s attention. Surely if she saw Kris, she’d call the male over to join them.

 

“It’s Hilda.” The girl frowned.

 

“Yeah whatever.” Tao dismissed her, eyes finding Kris in the crowd. “Do you want to dance or not?”

 

“Of course I do!” Hilda gasped as if Tao would even question that.

 

“Okay cool.” Tao grabbed the girl by the hand and pulled her into the crowd.

 

The dance floor was packed with bodies, everyone sweaty and intoxicated as they grinded up on one another and threw heated looks at their dance partners. Holly or Hilda or whatever her name was whined at how crowded it was when Tao pulled her into the middle of the dance floor but it provided Tao security. Being hidden amongst the center of the crowd like this was ideal, it would make it more difficult for Kris to spot Tao, and Tao would have a place to hide until he could finally leave this horrid gathering.

 

The music changed to some American song that was popular at the time and the crowded cheered briefly. Someone sloshed beer on Tao by accident while another person jostled their elbow into Tao’s back. It was hot and it was crowded. The heat made it difficult to breathe and Tao began to sweat in his sweater. He could smell the alcohol laced on everyone’s breath, feel the sweaty arms rubbing against him, or the intimate touches of people as they all grinded in one mass.

 

Hilda had taken to downing her drink, tossing the cup to the floor, and linking her arms around Tao’s neck. The teen froze, only slightly buzzed from his own drink, when Hilda began making eyes at him. The girl tossed her head to the side, blonde hair gathering to one side of her neck, as she turned around and pressed her rear to Tao’s groin.

 

“H-Hilda.” Tao stammered, as Hilda fixed him with a look over her shoulder.

 

“Don’t talk and just dance with me.” Hilda smirked, body screwing downwards as she dropped down low only to slowly rise back up. The girl balanced on her heels, dropping down almost to the floor as Tao’s groin came in contact with first her lower back and then rear. Then Hilda was slowly rising up, backing arching, as she pressed her rear roughly against Tao and rubbed upwards as she rose. The move sent sparks down to Tao’s groin and he shuddered, hands instinctively coming to rest on the girl’s hips. Then she was repeating the move.

 

As the pair continued to dance, across the room at the bar, Kris had detangled himself from his date and was encouraging her to join him on the dance floor. Then the tall blonde was making his way through the crowds of people, wanting to be dancing at the heart of it, totally oblivious to the dark-haired boy who was currently dancing in that area.

 

Kris grasped his date’s hand, and pulled her along, already pretty drunk as he arrived earlier in the night, and the Christmas lights overhead made the world spin beautifully. Kris felt happy, his worries and concerns long forgotten thanks to the aid of alcohol.

 

Meanwhile Hilda and Tao continued dancing. The girl had turned to face Tao now as the two grinded, her arms locked around Tao’s neck, as Tao’s hands rested steadily on her hips. Tao continued to scan the crowd, panicking slightly when he could no longer spot Kris by the bar. The teen worried his lip, looking around desperately trying to see where the tall blonde male had gone.

 

“Tao.” Hilda panted against the teen’s neck, rubbing herself against Tao’s half-hard groin and the teen choked. “Who are you looking for?”

 

“Nothing. I was just seeing where the rest of our hall had gone.” Tao winced when Hilda pressed down against him again.

 

It was not that Tao was particularly attracted her. No, in fact, Tao’s body was simply reacting between the mix of alcohol and his raging teenage testosterone. Tao had never thought of a man sexually before meeting Kris. The dark-haired teen had no girlfriends in secondary school either however. Tao lived a totally solitary life, which meant that his sexual frustrations were often relieved with his right hand. Between the hot sensual environment, the alcohol running through his blood, and Hilda pressing her wetness against Tao’s groin, the teen was becoming extremely bothered.

 

It was easy to pretend with Hilda, after all her shade of blonde was similar to Kris’s. The pair continued to dance no matter how much Tao’s heart ached. All he wanted to do was go up to Kris and beg for forgiveness but Tao couldn’t even spot him amongst the crowd any longer. Hilda continued to grind against Tao, totally oblivious to the fact that Tao was only half paying attention to her, while Tao simply prayed that Kris had left with his date. It had hurt when he’d seen the other male with a girl. Given that Tao had known that Kris was straight, but he couldn’t help but hope that maybe, just maybe, Kris would notice the strong connection he had with Tao as a friend and reconsider his feelings.

 

The music was pounding, the floor vibrating with the bass, as girls tossed their sweaty hair and boys groaned lowly in pleasure. Every couple was boy girl. There were no couples of the same sex there. Everyone around them was having an incredibly great time and Tao close his eyes, trying to accept the fact that Kris was really gone. It was foolish of Tao to ever have even developed feelings for Kris… of course someone as cool and handsome as Kris would not be… abnormal… like how Tao was. The thought of two men together was preposterous and Tao felt like an idiot for falling for another man.

 

“Tao.” Hilda breathed and Tao turned his attention back to the girl.

 

This, now this, dancing with a girl, was what was correct. Boys were supposed to like girls. Tao tightened his hold on the girl’s hips and leaned down to press his face into her neck. Hilda was delighted by Tao’s reaction and twined her arms tighter around the teen’s neck. The pair was pressed intimately together, Hilda overjoyed while Tao hid his tears in her hair. It hurt. Tao didn’t want anyone but Kris however that was impossible.

 

“Tao, I’ve liked you for a really long time.” Hilda whispered in Tao’s ear. “I want to know how you feel about me.”

 

Tao said nothing as he sniffed back his tears, he would not let them fall. Tao kept his eyes closed as he felt Hilda pull backwards. The girl studied Tao’s face, sympathy washing over her features, as she saw the pain etched on the other’s features.

 

“Tao.” Hilda whispered, urging Tao to look at her. “Tao, are you gay?”

 

“What?” Tao’s eyes snapped open. Hilda smiled sadly and brought a hand up to cup Tao’s face.

 

“There had been speculation but no one was entirely sure. I really like you, Tao. I like you a lot but I need to know if my efforts are pointless. You don’t really like me, do you?” Hilda did not look upset and Tao breathed a sigh of relief.

 

“I’m sorry.” He spoke softly. “You’re a beautiful girl but I just…”

 

“It’s fine.” Hilda smiled when Tao was unable to finish. “I just care a lot about you and as long as you are happy, then I’m happy.”

 

“You’re not going to tell everyone else… are you?” Tao winced.

 

“Of course not. It’ll be just between us. You’ll still talk to me? We can be friends, right?” Hilda was hopeful and Tao found himself smiling.

 

“Yeah.” The teen was no longer on the verge of tears, “I’d like that.”

 

“Good. So just once, so I know how it would have felt.” Hilda said and Tao stared at her puzzled.

 

“Huh?” Tao barely managed to get out before Hilda was pulling his face down towards her and claiming his lips. Tao just stood there in shock, not pulling back but not leaning in further, as Hilda kissed him. Then the girl was pulling away and opening her eyes to gaze at Tao.

 

“Tao,” A male voice suddenly spoke from behind Tao as he placed his hand on Tao’s shoulder, “We need to talk.”

* * *

Tao was pulled backwards, forced to face the speaker, when the large hand on his shoulder compelled him to turn around to see Kris.

 

Tao froze up, mouth dropping open, as he looked at Kris unsure if he was dreaming or not. Kris was glaring, not at Tao but at Hilda, sending Tao a disapproving look as his hand went from resting on Tao’s shoulder to tightly gripping his hand.

 

“K-Kris! What are you doing?” Tao’s face burned, eyes glued to where Kris was holding his hand.

 

“I need to talk to you about something right now.” Kris turned his attention to Tao.

 

“Kris! I-I…” Tao turned to look to Hilda only to see that she was long gone.

 

“No excuses. We’re talking _now_.” Kris commanded, taking Tao by the hand and leading him out of the bar.

 

“K-Kris! My coat! I left my coat and gloves inside!” Tao said, trying to twist free of Kris’s grip to no avail.

 

“Just shut up and follow me.” Kris continued marching through the snow, pulling Tao further and further away from the bar. Tao frowned and let Kris lead him until they were just at the edge of campus, the merry cheers of the bar only faint sounds in the distance, as they stopped under a streetlight. Tao worried his bottom lip, not sure if he should try and make a run for it when Kris let go, or actually hear the older boy out. What if Kris was angry about what happened and wanted to beat Tao up to teach him a lesson? Tao cringed at the thought.

 

“Alright.” Kris released Tao and shoved the smaller teen, “Now talk.”

 

“Ouch jeez.” Tao caught himself and glared at Kris. “About what?”

 

“You know about what.” Kris ran his hand through his dirty blonde hair and coughed, looking agitated. “Do you think it’s funny?”

 

“What?” Tao squinted, shivering when the cold wind blew right through his sweater.

 

“How did you find out?” Kris shouted, whirling around to face Tao. A look of fear and anger covered Kris’s face and Tao backed up slowly. The dark-haired teen had no idea what Kris was talking about but Tao thought it must have been related to the incident. Surely that was why Kris was so angry.

 

“Look,” Tao bit his lip, “Don’t get mad. Look, I’m sorry. I didn’t know that you would get mad.”

 

“Get mad? Of course I’m mad! That was a real asshole move, Tao!” Kris stepped closer and shoved Tao roughly in the chest. Tao stumbled, eyes widening in fear at Kris’s aggressive behavior.

 

“I’m sorry okay! I never wanted it to turn out this way!” Tao shouted, his chest tender from where Kris had hit him as his heart ached as well. It was not fair. Tao couldn’t control his feelings for Kris, he had tried, he really had, but Tao had fallen so hard for the older teen. It was just cruel of Kris now to be yelling at Tao like this.

 

“I thought you were my friend and then you go and pull some shit like this! That was low, Tao! That was really shitty of you!” Kris shouted, fists curling at his sides as tears began running down Tao’s face.

 

“I am your friend! I was your friend!” Tao sobbed, stepping forwards to confront Kris.

 

The dark-haired teen looked the other in the eye, dark eyes swimming with emotion, as he searched Kris’s face. Tao was a few inches shorter than Kris, his nose only coming to Kris’s chin, as the two stared each other down.

 

“I thought you were too… that’s why it hurt so bad.” Kris said, brow furrowed.

 

“I’m sorry… I couldn’t help it. I couldn’t.” Tao lowered his eyes, “I don’t know what came over me.”

 

“Why did you do it? More importantly, how did you find out?” Kris whispered, gaze taking in Tao’s thick lashes resting on his cheeks, tears clinging to them.

 

“I don’t know how I found out. It just happened over time. And I did it because,” Tao met Kris’s piercing eyes, “Because I…I like you.”

 

“What?” Kris jerked backwards and Tao squeezed his eyes closed.

 

“If you like me… then why would you do that?” Kris said slowly, confused by Tao’s response.

 

Tao blinked, face burning red. Did Kris really want to know the reason why?

 

“Well… um… it’s your smile.” Tao said shyly, face the color of a tomato.

 

“My smile?” Kris squinted at Tao in confusion.

 

“Yeah and how you smell and your personality… it all… I get hard.” Tao whispered that last part and now Kris’s ears were burning.

 

“If… if you like me like _that_ then why would you make fun of me?” Kris placed both his hands on Tao’s shoulders and tried to look the teen in the eye.

 

“Huh? Make fun of you? When did I make fun of you?”

 

“That day in my room. You were doing that to make fun of me for being gay, right?” Kris asked and Tao’s hearing narrowed down to only Kris’s voice. The teen’s shoulders sagged, his mouth opening slightly in shock, as he turned his rounded eyes onto the blonde.

 

“What did you just say?” Tao trembled and Kris squeezed his shoulders tightly.

 

“I’m gay. I thought you had found out somehow and were doing it to make fun of me.” Tao’s heart skipped a beat.

 

“I thought you hated me, that you were disgusted by the very thought of me. You looked so angry… wait…” Tao pushed out of Kris’s hold and brought his hands to his forehead. “I’m so very confused right now.”

 

“Tao.” Kris called softly, reaching out and wrapping the teen in his arms. Tao continued to stare at his feet, his mind furiously working to process the information that he had just heard. “I’m gay… and from what it sounds like, you are too?”

 

“I-I’m not gay!” Tao squeaked when Kris enveloped him. “I just...”

 

“You like me don’t you?” Kris whispered in Tao’s ear and the teen craned his neck to look at Kris, cheeks aflame.

 

“It’s only with you. I’m straight. It’s just… you’re the only guy that I can think about that way.” Tao willed his face to stop flushing so much but it was a lost cause.

 

Above them, snow began to fall lightly, just like when they had first met.

 

“Tao, I like you.” Kris said, his hot breath making the skin of Tao’s neck tingle. “I’ve liked you for a while but I wasn’t sure how you’d react if I told you.”

 

“Are you kidding me?” Tao whined, turning around in Kris’s hold and placing his hands on the elder’s chest. “I… I have liked you for a while now too. But I thought you were straight.”

 

“Well I’m not.” Kris’s hooded eyes, were glued to Tao’s mouth now and the dark-haired teen’s head was spinning. “Can I kiss you? I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since… I found you like that.”

 

“Kris.” Tao closed his eyes chastely and stood on his tiptoes.

 

Kris tightened his hold around Tao’s waist and leaned down to meet the younger student half-way. Then the pair’s lips were meeting in a soft sweet kiss, one boy desperately clinging to the other while the other sturdily held onto the smaller male.

 

Overhead, the snow continued to fall.

* * *

“K-Kris.” Tao mewled, eyes closed, body straining, as Tao tried his best not to cry out too loudly.

 

The pair was back in Kris’s room, clothes strewn on the floor, Tao spread out across the bed, as Kris knelt between Tao’s bent legs. The blonde was dutifully sucking Tao down, one large hand holding the boy firmly at the base, his other fondling Tao’s balls, while Kris slid his mouth up and down on the teen’s member.

 

They were moving fast. However this was no fairytale story, this was real life, and both Tao and Kris were incredibly hard and incredibly horny teenage boys. Kris was the aggressor in the situation, he’d cordially invited Tao back to his room since they were without coats in the cold, before jumping the boy in the doorway. Kris had sexual experience while Tao had not. True that they had only just confessed to each other a few hours ago but Tao had long been fantasizing about Kris for a while now. And after nineteen years, Tao was so through with being a virgin.

 

“Hmm.” Kris hummed his throat and Tao choked, head falling backwards in pleasure at the vibrations around his cock. Tao was braced on his elbows, head dangling backwards, Adam’s apple bobbing, as he struggled to keep quiet. The walls of the dorm were thin despite Kris’s reassurance that no one would be back from the party yet.

 

“Oh Kris.” Tao gazed down at the elder, stroking a shaking hand appreciatively through Kris’s thick mane of hair, “Feels so good.”

 

Kris smiled, sucking down Tao more with a loud wet pop, as he buried his nose in the fine hairs at Tao’s base. The dark-haired teen was mostly hairless but he could not help but feel self-conscious when he saw that Kris was totally waxed all over. The elder student’s hairless cock, long and slender, hung obscenely between his legs as it dragged along the bed whenever Kris shifted his weight. He was much longer than Tao and Tao found that he could not tear his eyes away from there. Never before had Tao seen another man bare and aroused before him in real life. It was sight that made Tao’s balls tighten.

 

“Tao.” Kris said around the boy, stroking up one of Tao’s milky thighs with his large hand. Tao mewled at the loss of stimulation with his balls but Kris quickly made up for it, by sloppily suckling Tao’s head.

 

The sensations running through the younger teen’s body was overwhelming and he cried out weakly, knees coming together only to be pried apart by Kris, as he felt his orgasm approaching. The blonde popped his mouth off to run his tongue along the underside of Tao’s member, moving then upwards and tonguing repeatedly at Tao’s slit.

 

“Ngh! Kris!” Tao moaned, trying to shove Kris’s head away but Kris caught Tao’s hand. “N-no! Stop! I’m almost about to…”

 

Tao looked down to Kris, eyes watering with tears, chest rising and falling, as Kris met Tao with dark eyes that spoke of challenge. Then the older student was engulfing Tao to the base, the teen’s member descending down the soft velvety warmness that was the back of Kris’s orifice when Kris deep-throated him. That coupled with the fact that Kris’s eyes never left Tao’s face was too much.

 

The dark-haired teen moaned, hands digging into Kris’s hair and the bed sheets, as Tao came undone. Tao moaned brokenly, throwing his head back against the pillows, his hips cantering upwards as Kris pulled off and watched Tao’s ecstasy shoot from his member in short bursts. The hot white mess landed stickily on Tao’s thighs, on his stomach, on the sheets, and some even got on Kris’s arm. Tao was utterly powerless in his orgasm, mouth making small mewling noises of delirious pleasure, noises that went straight to Kris’s cock. The blonde’s appendage twitched in want at the sounds that were falling past Tao’s small pink lips and Kris climbed over the teen, watching Tao until the dark-haired teen was completely spent.

 

“Oh.” Tao panted, hair sticking to his forehead, eyes wild, “Kris.”

 

“You’re so hot.” Kris whispered lowly in Mandarin and Tao moaned, linking his arms around Kris’s neck and boldly pulling the older boy in for a heated kiss. The pair’s tongues clashes, mouths opening, spit gathering between, as they kissed sloppily in their carnal desire for each other.

 

Kris pushed Tao backwards and rested his elbows on either side of the younger boy’s head, his arms forming a cage, as he angled his head and plundered Tao’s mouth. Where Tao was inexperienced in kissing, he made up for in vigor. The younger teen kissed Kris back with a passion that no one had ever kissed Kris with before. Kris found himself thoroughly enraptured with the beautiful dark-haired boy, his pale body glistening in the light coming in from the window, that lay strewn and ready for taking in Kris’s bed. Kris was painfully hard now, his body demanding release, but Kris was not sure if Tao was necessarily ready to take it that far.

 

Instead Kris humped downwards against the boy, his sticky member leaving trails on Tao’s hipbone, as Kris tried to get off. The rubbing brought pleasure, enough to make Kris’s body shudder, but it simply was not enough to bring him to the brink when he knew that Tao was lying beneath him.

 

“Tao.” Kris breathed hotly against the teen’s neck and Tao groaned.

 

“Kris.” Tao returned, nibbling on Kris’s lip and refusing to let go when Kris pulled backwards. The blonde’s lower lip remained in Tao’s playful biting teeth until final the skin snapped back into its right place. Tao’s neck was covered in hickeys, not the small kind, but the large red welt kind that would no doubt fade to a dark purple. Kris was a somewhat violent lover that often got too carried away in the moment but Tao did not seem to mind.

 

“Tao,” Kris said again, looking the teen in the eyes seriously, “I want to fuck you.”

 

“K-Kris.” Tao’s face still managed to blush a little despite it’s already flushed state. The teen was thoroughly debauched, his hair sticking out at odd angles, and Kris groaned at the boy’s shy reaction.

 

“Please.” Kris ducked his head down and peppered Tao’s face in kisses, “Please let me. God, I want you so badly right now. Please.”

 

“Kris,” Tao frowned, placing a weak hand on the other’s chest in attempt to push him off. Kris did not budge. “I’m not gay.”

 

“Tao, please.” Kris whined, his body pumping with arousal. “Please I’ll be gentle with you I swear.”

 

“I’m sorry.” Tao looked away, a bead of sweat sliding down his neck that Kris could not seem to tear his eyes away from. “I’m not ready for that yet. This is all still new to me.”

 

“T-Tao.” Kris gritted his teeth, smashing his face down between the junction of Tao’s neck and shoulder. The blonde groaned loudly in frustration, fisting the bed sheets at his side, while Tao stroked apologetically through his hair.

 

“I’m sorry… just not yet.” Tao continued to stroke Kris’s hair and Kris willed himself not to scream,

 

The pair remained like that for a few moments, Tao starting to doze off, when an idea occurred to Kris. The blonde propped himself up on his elbows, gazing in a glare at Tao’s surprised face, before Kris’s vision dropped down to Tao’s spent member between them.

 

“Okay fine then.” Kris said, wrapping his hand around Tao’s member and beginning to pump him.

 

“K-Kris! Ah!” Tao cried out, grabbing hold of Kris’s shoulders weakly as the older teen began to vigorously pump him. “W-what are you doing?”

 

“Getting you hard.” Kris returned simply, smiling in delight when Tao’s body began to react. Oh the wonders of youth.

 

“Kris, I told you no.” Tao tried to be serious but failed when he ended up moaning lowly when Kris twisted the skin around his head.

 

“I know you did and so I’m not going to do you.” Kris leaned closer over Tao, fishing around under his pillow, and emitting a victorious sound when he found the lube. “So you’re going to do me.”

 

“ _W-what_?” Tao practically screeched and Kris smirked.

 

“You haven’t done anything with anyone before, I get it. This is all scary and new, so I’m going to let you lose your virginity this way. The ‘normal’ way in a sense.” Kris squirted some of the clear substance into his palms and began mixing his fingers in the mess.

 

“Kris I don’t think…” Tao finished, unsure what to say to such a proposal. Tao wanted to be with Kris he did, he just wasn’t ready yet at this time, but Tao had always imagined that it would Kris that would be taking him. Tao also didn’t know how long it would take for Tao to be ready for that and he knew how much Kris wanted release now. A simple hand job or blowjob would not suffice.

 

“Tao, I want to be your first… in every sense. I know you’re not ready for me to do that to you but maybe if you do it to me, you’ll see it’s really not all that bad.” Kris peeked Tao on the cheek as his hands disappeared between his legs.

 

Tao watched in wonder, eyes wide, as Kris inserted his first finger into himself. Kris inhaled, willing his body to relax as to show Tao that it really was not all that scary, as he began to move. The lubrication allowed Kris to easily slide up and down on his middle finger once he was accustomed to the width and Kris moaned. Kris moved his hips, pushing deeper inside of himself, until suddenly it was not enough and his body was craving more.

 

“See,” Kris smiled, as he slipped his index finger along in with his middle, “It’s not bad at all.”

 

Kris was lying slightly. Kris had bottomed a few times before and occasionally liked using fingers while jacking off. He was stretched down there and that’s why it was so easy to slip two fingers inside. Of course Tao’s first time would hurt, Kris was large he knew that, and it would no doubt cause Tao a little discomfort no matter how much he conditioned Tao’s entrance up until that point. But Kris didn’t want Tao to fear sex, he wanted to show the boy how good it could be, and what pleasure Kris would bring him.

 

“Kris, are you sure about this?” Tao asked softly. One might think that Tao was having second thoughts but the problem between his legs clearly disagreed.

 

“I’m sure.” Kris scissored his fingers, not caring about finding that spot inside of him. All he wanted to do was to get this moving as fast as he could before Tao backed out on him.

 

“Won’t it hurt?” Tao winced as Kris began adjusting their bodies on the bed. Kris lied down on his stomach, wrapping his long legs around Tao to ensure that the teen would not bolt when his back was turned. Kris looked over his shoulder and smiled.

 

“I want this. Don’t worry.” Kris reached a hand back to squeeze Tao’s thigh reassuringly and Tao blushed.

 

“What do I do then?” Tao scanned Kris’s body overwhelmed.

 

“Okay, first coat yourself in lube.” Kris instructed, widening his legs so that he laid spread eagle on the bed. The blonde shivered a little when he felt the room’s temperature creep up against his opening and Tao just knelt there frozen.

 

“O-okay. What now?” Tao asked, hands sticking with lube from where he’s messily covered himself.

 

“Okay good. Now grip yourself at your base and I’m going to lift my hips alright?” Kris moved into position, coming up on his knees and hands, so that his rear bumped Tao’s member. “When you’re ready, let me know, and push in.”

 

“T-That’s it?” Tao hips bucked on their own accord when the soft flesh of Kris’s rear kissed his crown. “I just push in?”

“Yup. Do it slowly though.” Kris looked over his shoulder to where Tao was worrying his lip. “Don’t be nervous. I want this.”

 

“Uh huh.” Tao still sounded unsure. Kris came up onto his knees and spun around to face the teen. Tao looked to Kris in surprise, big doe eyes blinking at him, when Kris cupped Tao’s face in both of his hands.

 

“I want this.” Kris spoke softly, gaze boring into Tao.

 

“I want this,” Kris grabbed hold of Tao’s member and then teen’s breath hitched, “And I want you.”

 

“I want this too, Kris. I just want you. I’m sorry we couldn’t do it the other way.” Tao’s eyes watered and Kris did not hesitate to pull the younger teen in for a kiss.

 

Kris kissed Tao passionately, taking no prisoners as he devoured the teen’s mouth, hot hands possessively clasping onto Tao’s hips, as his hips came to grind in slow circles with Tao’s. The movement caused both of their cocks to rub together and Tao moaned weakly into Kris’s mouth. Tao’s heart felt like it was about to explode in that moment and he clung to Kris desperately.

 

“Will you do this for me?” Kris pulled away, “Do this for us.”

 

“I will.” Tao nodded, smiling. Kris beamed and got back into position, tossing the dark-haired teen a goofy smile over his shoulder.

 

“Just push in, okay?” Kris rolled his shoulders and grounded his knees into the bedding in preparation.

 

“Okay.” Tao scooted closer until his member was nudging Kris’s entrance, “I’m going to do it.”

 

“Right.” Kris hung his head and gritted his teeth as Tao slowly began to slide in.

 

The initial slide was painful, Tao’s surprisingly thick member pushing past Kris’s tight ring of muscles, but the lube did help ease the friction a little. Behind Kris, Tao was moaning wantonly, his eyes closed, fingers digging into Kris’s hips, as he became fully seated within the blonde. Kris arched his back and sucked Tao in deeper, sighing in relief when he finally found a comfortable position.

 

“You good?” Kris asked after moment when Tao had yet to move.

 

“Y-yeah.” Tao’s voice was small and in awe. Kris chuckled a little and rocked his hips back towards Tao. The dark-haired teen moaned in surprise, legs almost giving out, when Kris moaned loudly.

 

“God, Tao,” Kris hung his head and snarled, “Move dammit!”

 

“Kris!” Tao’s voice was dripping with ecstasy when the teen began to move. He thrust into Kris shallowly at first, afraid of hurting the blonde, when Kris had snapped at him to fucking take him like a man. Then Tao really began moving.

 

The two voiced their pleasure as Tao hit that spot dead-on and Kris contracted around Tao. Sweat gathered between Tao’s shoulders and dripped down his back as he did his best to continually thrust deep and hard into Kris. The blonde was demanding, continually yelling at Tao to go deeper, but the dark-haired teen held some reserves about being too rough with the older student. In truth, Tao felt incredibly awkward. He realized that he really was not cut out for this topping business and decided that if, and when, Kris and he ever had sex again, Tao wanted to be on the receiving end.

 

The teen just felt totally inadequate when Kris had twisted around, Tao still inside of him, and pushed Tao downwards onto the bed so that Kris could straddle him. The blonde was preposterously taller than Tao so their positioning was a bit awkward. Tao simply lay there, feeling more like he was on the receiving end than Kris, as the blonde thrust down into his lap. Kris’s pace was aggressive and left Tao moaning weakly, his hips thrusting upwards but no nearly fast enough as Kris thrust downwards. In turn, the bed rocked unevenly between but Tao did not care.

 

Tao was in pure bliss despite his embarrassment to fully satisfy Kris. He watched Kris with hooded eyes, mouth agape, as Kris roughly held onto Tao’s shoulders and rocked above him. The older teen’s actions were not wanton in any manner, just simply frustrated with his bed partner’s lack of skills, as Kris basically used Tao’s body to get off. But still, even despite this, Kris’s heart warmed when he saw the blissed out sleepy gaze Tao was watching him with.

 

Kris angled his hips and moaned, Tao’s member hitting that spot dead-on, and he began pistioning down his hips punishingly, ramming that spot over and over again. Kris cried out, his balls tightening, before finally he was blowing his load. He cursed up a storm as he came undone, hips riding out the waves. Kris’s orgasm, and the consequential tightening of his body, was enough to send Tao over the edge for the second time that night. The dark-haired teen cried out, voice strained, as he called Kris’s name.

 

Then both boys were collapsing onto the bed, Tao slipping out of Kris, as the taller boy wrapped Tao up in his arms and spooned the boy from behind. Tao smiled lazily as Kris began to press soft kisses into his hair.

 

“Kris?” Tao hugged the older boy’s arm to his chest, “Next time I want you to top… actually maybe from now on you top.”

 

“Oh yeah?” Kris laughed, squeezing Tao in his hold playfully, “I thought you did just a fine job… but yeah maybe next time I take you.”

 

“Hey!” Tao whined and Kris laughed.

 

“You said so yourself too!’ Kris caught Tao’s lips with his as the moment suddenly turned sweet. The pair continued kissing chastely before slowly pulling apart to look each other in the face.

 

“I really like you.” Kris confessed, arms tightening around Tao’s stomach.

 

“I really like you too.” Tao returned softly as Kris leaned in to kiss him again.

 

Inside the dorm, to boys lay naked in bed together kissing. Both were from different walks of life and after a few misunderstandings, were perfectly happy together. They would face more difficulties in the future when it came time whether to make their relationship public or when jealously caused accusations of infidelity between the two. However these challenges would easily be overcome as long as they worked together as a team.

 

Inside the dorm, two happy boys began their relationship together… Outside, the snow kept falling softly.


End file.
